The one-year anniversary of my son Henry's birth / death is approaching... 5 days away to be exact. Lately, as my heart has begun to heal and my faith has begun to be restored, I have reflected on how painful that experience truly was. I can't eat the Zone bars that I ate daily at the end of my pregnancy, can't eat Tropical Smoothie Cafe (since that was what I ate in the days and weeks following his death), will not listen to songs from last year on the radio, and regret to see reminders all over the place as spring pushes winter away outdoors.
I was in such a state of shock - and defeat - that I went through the spring and summer practically numb. I talked with friends, gave and received hugs, went to Church, read with students, laughed out loud occasionally... but I didn't really enjoy any of it.
I can see that now, as I am finally able to reflect. I hope that one year from now I will be reflecting on joy instead of sorrow.
But don't we all hope for that...?
MWM Turns 30
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